‘The Unofficial Hallmark(ish) Parody Musical’ stages a clever Christmas comedy
‘The Unofficial Hallmark(ish) Parody Musical’ is a live, side-splitting send up to classic holiday movie tropes.
‘Tis the season for off-key carols, ornamental trees, ugly sweaters and a non-stop rotation of cliché romance movies. Anyone who’s ever scrolled by the sentimental card channel at this time of year will have seen the cutesy, one-dimensional titles, like this year’s Twelve Dates ‘Til Christmas and Christmas Above the Clouds. The plots are almost all the same as someone goes back to their quaint little town for the holidays and falls in love with an unlikely match before the film’s end. This tired-and-true formula is the basis for the comedic stage production, The Unofficial Hallmark(ish) Parody Musical, which had its world premiere in Toronto.
Busy executive Holly (Alexandra Clementi) must close a big merger by Christmas Eve, which is only days away. But a face call with her mom, Merry (Emily Richardson), reveals some serious health concerns. When Holly fails to convince Merry that her heart stopping is a problem, she decides to go home for the holidays to help her mom run her countless businesses. So, Holly entrusts the contracts with her assistant, Brenda (Luke Witt), hops on a plane and heads back to her small town. Meanwhile, Merry hopes to lure Holly back from the big city with the prospect of reuniting with her recently widowed high school sweetheart, Mark (Sean Meldrum).
The comical script leans heavily into all the holiday movie clichés. Everything about the production is tongue-in-cheek. From the on-the-nose lyrics and dialogue to the cheekily labelled props, the musical doesn’t miss an opportunity to poke fun at the formulaic stories and their generic settings. In addition, actors frequently wink at the audience, breaking the fourth wall and making them feel like part of the narrative.
The women in the play are far more self-aware than their male counterparts. They’re blissful, but not ignorant. The absurdity of their conscious prioritization of love above all else is the basis for the script’s wry humour. The mindless movies the musical mocks ignore all the advancements of feminism in favour of wintry fairy tales in which the princess can’t find happiness unless she finds her Prince Charming.
This senseless notion is clearly and hilariously defined in the musical’s third number, “Love or Career.” The lyrics consist of a series of women describing the thriving careers they left behind when they fell in love — because women can’t have both. No amount of professional success could ever compare to the joys of marriage. Or, at least that’s what these stories want you to believe.
The intentionally over-the-top performances are even bigger when delivered against the minimalist set design. Cookie (Heidi Michelle Thomas) delightfully chews the scenery as Merry’s best-friend-turned-rival. She’s a mix of the most charismatic Disney villains — Cruella de Vil and Ursula — with a touch of Divine for good measure. Consequently, “Cookie Doesn’t Crumble” is a saucy, hip-swinging number that really draws audiences in with its catchy tune.
Meanwhile, anyone who’s ever visited Darien Lake will appreciate the song, “A Moose is Loose.” Injecting some holiday hijinks into the story, Merry’s recluse moose named Bruce escapes the petting zoo, interrupting the annual Christmas cookie competition.
The likeable pop soundtrack is filled with choruses that will have audiences singing along in between the laughter. Closing with “Feels like Christmas,” the musical is an excellent way to get into the holiday spirit, while lampooning some of its unrealistic expectations.
Catch The Unauthorized Hallmark(ish) Parody Musical from Nov. 20, 2025 to Jan. 4, 2026 at The Royal. Tickets are available at Hallmarkish.com and through Fever.
